Modern Marriage: Why It’s Harder to Keep Than Before

Introduction
Marriage today is very different from what it used to be in our grandparents’ time. Many couples now find it difficult to stay together, and divorce rates are rising. But why is this happening?

Then vs. Now: A Shift in Purpose
In the past, marriage was more of a social or economic agreement. Families arranged marriages to build alliances, grow wealth, and have children to carry on the family name. Love, happiness, or personal compatibility were not the main focus.

Today, marriage is based on love, mutual respect, and companionship. People marry for personal happiness and emotional fulfilment, not just to meet family or societal expectations.

Changing Roles and Expectations
Traditionally, the husband was the head of the home and the main provider, while the wife took care of the house and children. Divorce was rare and often seen as shameful, so couples stayed together even if they were unhappy.

Now, roles are shared. Both partners often work and contribute to the home. There’s more focus on communication, emotional support, and shared goals. People expect their partner to meet their emotional needs, and if that doesn’t happen, they may choose to leave the marriage.

The Wedding vs. the Marriage
In the past, more attention was given to the dowry or bride price. Today, the focus has shifted to the wedding celebration itself. Weddings have become more expensive, but the deeper meaning of marriage is sometimes overlooked.

The Knowledge Gap
Many people enter marriage with good intentions but without understanding how much things have changed. They expect marriage to work like it did in the old days, without preparing for the challenges of modern life.

This lack of knowledge and preparation is one reason many marriages struggle. People are not always ready to handle the emotional, financial, and personal demands of a modern partnership.

The Role of Counselling
That’s why it’s so important to start your marital journey with the help of a good counsellor. A counsellor can help you:

• Understand what marriage truly involves today
• Discuss your future as a couple
• Identify possible areas of conflict
• Learn how to handle challenges with wisdom and grace

It’s also helpful to have regular check-ins with your counsellor after marriage to keep your relationship strong and healthy.

Final Thoughts
Marriage is still a beautiful and meaningful journey—but it requires understanding, effort, and support. Don’t walk into it blindly. Prepare well, seek wise counsel, and build your relationship on a strong foundation.

“Without good direction, people lose their way; the more wise counsel you follow, the better your chances.”— Proverbs 11:14 (MSG).